life update! how it's been going...

 

Hey, y'all! Here’s an April update!

This won't be in any discernible order, so I apologize in advance if it gets a little all over the place.

I work at a roller coaster/adventure park. It’s tough work and I’m on my feet all day, on concrete, and no matter what the weather is outside, I’m in it, directly. Snow, rain, hail, sleet, wind, and sun. I work with a good crew. The mechanic is an eclectic Christian who loves sharing wild stories of how he's served God over the years. One supervisor is a cool Cambodian kid who is pretty extreme but very smart and has good instincts. We have a guy who brings wacky shit to work like drones and Aztec demon whistles. We play Frisbee and we play with a green soccer ball when it’s slow.

I mostly drive the Jeep these days because of the mileage it gets vs. the truck. Kem works here in town, so she gets the truck. Boooooo! I likes drivings the trucks. But on days off I get to haul water in it so that’s happy times. Last night I put air in the tires so it’s good. Me and tires have never had a great relationship. In fact, it’s always nasty. But I keep fighting. I have “new” used ones off a three-quarter ton that I’m waiting to throw on, but I never seem to have the hundred bucks I’ll need to get them swapped. So, I wait. Story of my life.

My dog, Henry, is doing wonderfully! We play every chance we get. He loves to chase huge tennis balls around the yard or play pull on the rope with me. He also loves to jump. Yesterday, I popped the hood to hook up my mini air compressor and the bitch was in the engine bay, just like that. Pop! There he was. I got pictures! Oh, he's a good dog. When both parents work he has to be in a pen, which I hate, but until I can find something else, that’s how it works. Poor guy. But now since I have Sunday and Monday off, which they say is a schedule I might keep, he only has three days in his pen! The other four at least one of us is home. Our days off aren't the same. Never are. So that’s good for Henry!

The weather is getting better so I've got the hot dog cart in mind. It’s nearly time to start that bitch up and see what kind of fun and money can be had! I have other ideas, too, I've been throwing around. The goal is to work less and still have a reasonable amount of money. Fifty years old is not the same as forty years old, I’m finding. I gotta get out of this physical, hourly game.

I've been working on me, too. My mental state, my emotions, the way I handle things. I’m finding holes in my game everywhere, and every second of every day is spent battling my own responses to situations and the thoughts that float around and enter my own head. It’s fun but it’s exhausting. But it’s no worse than giving in to those stupid thoughts and having them ruin a day, so I keep fighting.

Since the weather is getting better, the weeds will begin to grow again, which means I’m gonna have to fix the riding lawn mower. It got a fucked amount of thick wire tangled up in the blade last season and just stopped. So that’ll be fun. Not this weekend, though. No, today I think I’ll get some water (we haul our own here) and do a couple small chores before streaming and then just take it easy. It’s day two of my new weekend schedule and I’m loving it. I've been off on Monday and Friday so long it seems surreal to have such a big break. Yessssssss! I love it!

Also, I need eyeglasses still but don’t want them. Months and months ago, Henry found them and ate them. He was only a puppy. But it freaked me out entirely because we were not in a good situation financially or any other way. Before they broke, I would have sworn on a bible that no glasses meant no more living. How can I drive? Watch a movie? Do anything?

But you know what? The ole brain finds a way to make it work. I've now been without eyeglasses for the better part of a year and I don’t miss them almost at all. And no, my eyesight isn't good. At all. I’m blind as shit at night. Yet, I make do. And I love the ease of not having to fuck with them. Always bending, always gotta be cleaned, always slipping down the nose, always something. Life is better without a zillion small annoyances, even if it means you have to sacrifice some comfort and possibly even safety.